Little Thoughts

Relevant Excerpts from “The Unbearable Lightness of Being”

“The idea of eternal return is a mysterious one, and Nietzsche has often perplexed other philosophers with it: to think that everything recurs as we once experienced it, and that the recurrence itself recurs ad infinitum!

“Putting it negatively, the myth of eternal return states that a life which disappears once and for all, which does not return, is like a shadow, without weight, dead in advance, and whether it was horrible, beautiful, or sublime, its horror, sublimity, and beauty mean nothing. [...]

“If every second of our lives recurs an infinite number of times, we are nailed to eternity as Jesus Christ was nailed to the cross. It is a terrifying prospect. In the world of eternal return the weight of unbearable responsibility lies heavy on every move we make. [...]

“The heavier the burden, the closer our lives come to earth, the more real and truthful they become. [...]

“Conversely, the absolute absence of a burden causes man to be lighter than air.. and become only half real, his movements as free as they are insignificant.

“What then shall we choose? Weight or lightness?”

I watch myself make the same choices and mistakes, learn the same lessons, and act as if I failed to grasp them in an eternally significant way, as if I’d not learned the same lessons hundreds of times before, over and over.  Should I take what I value and act as if it is eternally important? Half the time I say yes, and act rightly, half the time, I say no, and act out, relearn the same lesson, selfishly.

This contrast, between eternal meaning and the idea of life as fleeting, to be lived in the moment, of  gravity vs. solipsism has not yet been settled upon in my mind.  I feel like one must either decide that everything is eternally meaningful and act under that weight with consistency, or decide that everything is meaningless and accept the frightening absence of solidity to be truly satisfied with ones actions.

You can’t decide you want something badly enough to fight for it, just to, in a moment of inexplicable lightness, turn against everything you’ve fought for, because “What does it all mean anyway?”  You also can’t throw your dreams out because “What does it all mean anyway?” only to long for a life lived meaningfully at the end of it all.

You’ve got to choose and act accordingly, consistently, if you want to end up satisfied with the life you’ve lived.  This is not a time for balance, but for a firm and absolute decision.

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